The Stoic philosopher Epictetus — a former slave — built his entire philosophy around a single distinction: some things are 'up to us' (eph' hēmin) and some things are not. What's up to us is our judgment, impulse, desire, and aversion. What isn't up to us is everything else — reputation, outcomes, other people's behavior, the weather on your Sunday plans. Most of our suffering, Epictetus argued in the Enchiridion, comes not from events themselves but from our stubborn insistence on treating 'not up to us' things as if they were. Today, before reacting to something that's frustrating you, try running it through this filter: Is this actually mine to control? Often, the answer frees you faster than any solution would.

What is one thing you've been expending energy on this week that, if you're honest, was never actually in your control — and what might you do differently with that energy?

Drawing from Stoicism — Epictetus